The Hardest Break-Up I've Ever Had

“It’s not you, it’s me.”

I’m moving to a different country, and I’m about to break up with my gym. And my personal trainer. At the same time. But this post will not be a story of sadness – rather I’m looking back on my four months as a regular at my gym.

America may be known as “The Land of the Free”, but it would probably be better known as “The Land of A Whole Lot of New Food Places To Try”. As I mentioned in my first post for this blog, I decided I needed to lose the weight I’d gained as a student, so I’d already planned on joining a gym when I arrived. However, I got further encouragement upon discovering the myriad of different food places available, right on my doorstep. I’m not saying that I have KFC for dinner every night, but only having a number of months in Kentucky, of course I was going to sample some of the local cuisine. As we all know, a healthy diet paired with exercise is the key to weight loss/being healthy (disclaimer: I’m not a nutritionist or a personal trainer, so don’t sue me if it doesn’t work out for you), but you’re allowed everything in moderation, right? Anyway, the point is, I joined a gym AND got a personal trainer. I also had some motivation: two weddings in February/March. And so my journey began…

Growing up, I was a gymnast, a dancer, a swimmer, a netballer and a horse rider. I also used to spend my school holidays working with racehorses, rather than sitting on the couch watching TV. As a result I was always active, and never really had to work that hard to stay fit (although there’s times when my netball coaches may have disagreed as I slowed towards the end of the game). Sadly, I let my student lifestyle get the better of me, and upon completing my free physical assessment when I joined the gym, the only word to describe how I felt was embarrassed. So I immediately signed up to have a personal trainer twice a week and slowly began an obsession with “active wear”.

I’m not going to lie to you, joining the gym is the easy part. Maintaining the motivation to work out on a regular basis is a little harder, although I can assure you it gets easier after a period of time. Having appointments with a personal trainer is also a guaranteed way to force yourself to the gym. It is easy to use excuses, often consisting of feeling tired, but honestly, from personal experience you feel much better if you go and complete a workout – no matter the intensity or length. Some days you’ll feel like Usain Bolt or Ronda Rousey, and other days you’ll wonder if you’re making any progress at all. But I can guarantee that once you’ve pushed through the workout and seen it to the end, you’ll be so glad you did. And once you realise you’re throwing around 65lb, or you can do more sit-ups than ever before, consecutively, without using your arms to help you, you may just become a little addicted to working out.

Having been a regular attendee of the gym, and seeing improvements in my strength and fitness, one of the biggest obstacles that I try to overcome on a daily basis is comparing myself to others. I’ll often notice that my weights are smaller than the guy beside me, or that my treadmill speed isn’t quite the same as the woman next to me who is barely breaking a sweat. I’m constantly trying to keep my competitive spirit and curious nature in check – I need to use these traits to motivate myself to be better than the person I was yesterday, not the bodybuilder I’m sharing the floor with today. Everyone in the gym is following a different fitness journey, and I’d put money on the fact that no one else’s is quite like mine.

An integral part of my journey so far has been my trainer. She won’t see this, as we’re not connected on any form of social media, however there’s no way I’d have got to where I am without her. To the naked eye, the changes may not be blindingly obvious (although going up an extra hole in my belt is!), but when I look through my training book and see the increase in weights and reps, feel the improvement in my cardio work and start to see a little more muscle definition than usual, there’s no doubt that she’s played a big role. Some people scoff at others for studying sport-related degrees, as “they’ll just be a personal trainer”. However now that I’ve had one, I know that’s not fair – these people can make a genuine difference.

At this point I’d like to add a little anecdote here as the credit cannot completely go to my trainer; I have to acknowledge the way I was brought up…about a month into my relationship with the gym, my trainer told me she had been trying to test my limits to see where I would give up, only she was starting to realise that maybe I didn’t have any. A good example of why this could be is a story of great parenting. Mum – do you remember that time you made me do netball training with an injured foot, only to later discover that it was broken? Well thank you, because that’s one of the reasons I appreciate the phrase “harden up”.

There’s definitely times when I have to remind myself of that commonly used phrase. Sometimes the only way I get through a set with my trainer watching is by telling myself that not everyone has arms, so I should just be grateful that I have two of them to lift this bar above my head. It also helps that my trainer is standing there telling me that I’m “killing it”. The gym is a place where physical activity is priority, but honestly your mind really can have a huge effect. I saw a quote recently that said “your mind will quit a thousand times before your body will”, and there’s a lot of truth to that. For example when I was sweating buckets on the treadmill yesterday and thought my legs couldn’t handle the incline any more, I reminded myself of that quote and my legs felt a little lighter.

Sadly, I have no “before and after” photos to show you – there’s no six-pack. Yet. I’m learning that changes don’t happen overnight and I have to be patient. However these little changes will eventually add up to something much larger, I’ll reach my current goals and create new ones (and now that I’ve said this on the internet, I guess I have to hold up to my end of the bargain). But in all seriousness, I’ve actually learned to love the gym. It’s not for everyone, but it is for me, and that’s why it’s so hard to break up. As the (lesser-known) saying goes, “there’s plenty more gyms on the streets”, so I’ll have a new membership in no time.

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” - Unknown

That’s all for now,

Jordyn x